Monday, June 11, 2012

Typical Monday Post and a Few Regrets

First off, obviously a typical Monday post means that it's pretty much about nothing awesome except what I did this weekend, which did actually include some awesomeness.

Had an amazingly great weekend but of course....for the 3rd week in a row...it included drinking beer.  I really want to stop this bad trend.  For me...drinking just does not belong in my weightloss journey.  It just adds unnecessary calories and leads to PLDs. (Poor life decisions).  I can honestly say I only had about 5 beers this weekend and that was spread out during a whole day of drinking Saturday.  My friends were peer pressuring me to drink with them (assholes. yes you).  But clearly I have no self control and ended up willingly drinking the rest of the night.  This has got to stop.  I think it is because I feel SO FREE now that I am out of that terrible 3 year relationship. I am much more social and just want to do everything I wasn't "allowed" to do before. I'm out.of.control.  Totally kidding.

Anyways, the friend who was having the get together lives on the eastern shore of Maryland.  It's such an amazing place, so pretty.  She has her own dock!  We pretty much just sat outside on the dock all day and talked, drank and had a great time. She just got engaged on Friday and actually asked me to be a bridesmaid in her wedding!! So excited!  This also means that I have a year to step up my game and look good for her wedding.
The steps leading down to the dock.
Def was huffing and puffing on the way back up.
embarrassing.
Now on to the regrets...

This weekend I took a few progress pics of me in shorts and a sports bra.  I wanted to see what I really looked like and to see if my body has changed.  Seems like everyone who has a blog and IG do the same thing.  I really regret not taking pics when I first started at 315lbs in January 2011.  The pics I took this weekend....look kinda good. No lies.  I think I am just a really big girl. I weigh like 266lbs and I pretty much have one roll on my tummy and that's it.  I'm not really too ashamed of them and I think I look pretty good for 266lbs! I think about 40lbs of that is laying onnnn myyyyy chest. ugh.

I am going to seriously consider posting those pics on my blog.  I want to first wait a few weeks so I can do a comparison, then I may just put them up here.  Possibly the bravest thing I would do so far on this journey.   But honestly...what's there to hide?  Everyone already knows my weight so what's the point in hiding my pics?  Especially if it will help others relate to me and give them motivation for their journeys.  I already know i'm fat so I shouldn't care sharing it with the world. Whatever.  I will do it...in a few weeks. hahaha. :)

Here is a pic I took this morning to see if my double chin is getting smaller.  It is :)  Even though I have been maintaining my weight in the 260s (not by choice), I still can see differences in my body.  My double chin has shrunk and my arms have muscle under the 10 inches of fat.  I can feel it there! When I flex, something inside moves. So excited about that!
Terrible no makeup pic with a stupid smirk.
But...my double chin is mostly gone when you look
straight on! :)

 I am trying to get in some easy walks for a little exercise this week.  I can't sit around anymore, I haveeee to do something to jump start my weightloss again.  I walked 3 miles yesterday and my pace was sooooo slow, but that's ok.  All I can do is slow right now.  My hamstring still hurts a lot but I have been able to avoid percocets most days.  That must mean it is getting better maybe?  My doctor wants me to go see a specialists, so that miiiiight happen but prob not.


I am trying to stay positive and just deal with the road blocks that were handed to me.  I am never giving up on this journey.  I have come so far and to give up now would be pointless.  I know what I want and I know what it takes to get it.  So that is what i'm going to do, no matter how long it takes me.

1 comment:

  1. GOod for you for taking those pics. I dont have the balls for that yet. Walking 3 miles is great!!

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